So, I had this conversation today:
GINA: Did you guys ever see that Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter movie?
ME: Yes! I totally dug it! It was...exactly what you would expect it to be.
SARAH: No, I haven't, but I really wanted to! Did you see it in 3D?
ME: No, just in...regular movie D. Which would be 2D, wouldn't it?
EMMA: Oh, my God. Are you guys serious? I had such a fear of Abraham Lincoln when I was a kid. Like, I couldn't even be in class when they were talking about freeing the slaves or whatever. (sees the looks on our faces) No, you guys! I'm serious!
SARAH: (cheekily) Really? I have such a crush on him; he's my favorite president. The way he freed those slaves? Mmm, damn.
ME & GINA: (hysterical laughter)
EMMA: No! Oh my God, you guys. You take like my least favorite person ever and have him hunt my hero Edward Cullen? He was so tall and skinny and all he did was wear that creepy hat and chop down cherry trees and build houses out of logs. (pause) And free the slaves.
ME: Um, okay. But, the freeing the slaves thing. That was pretty big.
EMMA: He just totally freaks me out. I'm serious. With his top hat and his ginger hair and handlebar mustache.
ME: Wait. What? Who are you talking about?
EMMA: Abraham Lincoln!
ME, SARAH, GINA: (look at each other in silence)
SARAH: I don't think he was ginger...
SARAH: And he didn't have a mustache. I mean, he had a beard, but...
EMMA: Oh...Am I thinking of a different president?
ME: I mean, maybe. Teddy Roosevelt had a mustache.
ME: Or Taft?
EMMA: I don't know who that is. I think Kennedy was my favorite president. I like his jaw. I would feel safe with his jaw.
SARAH: Yeah, he was handsome.
EMMA: Did you guys know Twilight comes out tonight. Do you want to go?
ME: Well, I've not read the books or seen the movies, but if you really want someone to come with you-
EMMA: No, then you can't come! It would taint your head for the rest of them!
Teachers, guys. We're teachers.